The Cubs
If you're reading this and you know who I am you probably know that I am a huge Cubs fan. However, many of you may not know how I became a Cubs fan. Well, it all started when I chose to skip a birthday party and go to Fun-plex (A child's dream hang out) with my neighbor.
Not many people remember Fun-Plex, so I'm going to fill you in on what you missed out on as a child. It was a playplace of sorts in a giant wharehouse on Winchester, if memory serves me correct. You walk in, and the first thing you see is a Moon Bounce, that to me seemed as big as a football field, keep in mind I was only four. Then they had this large platform, elevated in the air. In order to reach the top you had to climb tunnels, ladders, and other various things. Once you reached the top you had the choice of multiple slides to return to the ground, like I said, it was a Child's dream place. The fun did not end there. They had bumper boats, scooters, and a giant ball pit connected by bridges and smaller ball pits. I spent most of my time frolicing in the ball pit. (No comments on that)
Well, it was towards the end of our time at Fun-Plex, and my friend and I decided to go on the GIANT Moon Bounce before we left. I was hopping around and having fun, when the attendee decided to let much bigger kids on. I'd say they were probably 11 or 12 years old, remember I was only four. So, I had enough fun on the moon bounce and was making my way towards the exit when I fell down, no big deal right? Wrong! When I fell down a portly African-American girl, around 11 or 12, jumped on my right leg. Little did I know that this portly girl snapped my femur in two. The attendee came in and picked me up and brought me out. They placed me on a bench by the moon bounce and determined my femur was broken. So, my friend and his mom had to rush me to the nearest hospital, St. Francis. I remember getting there and being administered a few shots, and then everything went black. I woke up and they had my leg suspended in the air, and I was in a hospital bed.
The next day they took me into some room and I remember a mask being placed over my mouth and a doctor telling me a story about his dog Toby and how he didn't like to take baths, it was his lame attempt at trying to tell me we may not like what is happening to us at a moment but it is probably for the best. Which is actually good advice, but that's a different rant. Anyways, when I woke up in my room I was in a cast, not just a regular leg cast, but a body cast. They went the full nine yards.
Well, I stayed in the hospital for a few more days where I developed my keen Super Mario Bros. skills. Anyways, they finally took me home where I was forced to lay around, or be wheeled around all day. Don't worry I haven't forgotten the reason I'm writing this.
So, my days consisted of laying around and watching various TV shows. One such show was the classic Family Matters. I could not get enough of Urkel and his love for cheese. I watched that show everyday on WGN. However, one day I could not get to the remote to go to Nickelodeon once Family Matters was over. And guess what came on next. Yes, Chicago Cubs baseball. I fell in love with the Cubs, my dad came home and I started talking about Mark Grace, Shawon Dunston, ERA, batting averages, and all things good with Cubs baseball. Ever since this fateful day I have been a die hard Cubbie fan. Win or lose, I still love them and will always believe next year is the year. Damn you Bartman!
Which brings me to my next point. What is wrong with the 2006 Cubs?
Based on the offseason I thought we'd be in great shape for a playoff run. General Manager, Jim Hendry, made some great offseason acquisitions. We signed the speedy Juan Pierre to fill the role of lead off man, a position that has been an issue for the Cubs for years. Then Hendry addressed the bullpen problem by signing Howry and Eyre, two proven talents who would help the Cubs tremendously throught the season. Finally, Hendry was able to get Jacque Jones in Cubbie blue and be our everyday Left Fielder. Then the Billy Goat started wreaking havoc on the Cubs.
Cub fans soon learned that staff aces Mark Prior and Kerry Wood would not be ready to start the season, and would probably not return to the club until May. Wood is back, but we're in June now and Prior has not yet rejoined the team. If the loss of your two best pitchers wasn't enough, Derrek Lee went down with a broken wrist. For those of you who don't know, Derrek Lee is one of, if not the best first basemen in the MLB. He hits for power, average, drives the ball to the opposite field, and is a remarkable defensive first basemen. Losing DLee not only took away talent, but the heart of the Cubs. It just seems that since that injury the team is hapless. And it doesn't help that Dusty Baker, our coach, is a moron.
Dusty, Dusty, Dusty. Players love him, the fans hate him. The Cubs have a history of brittle arms, Dusty knows this, but he constantly leaves our starters in the game for too long. Carlos Zambrano totals 120 pitches almost every game he pitches in, well above the league average. And you wonder why our pitchers are always going down with injuries? Also, why does he play Neifi Perez. The man is batting below .200, is a terrible fielder (had two errors on one play that allowed the game winnings runs to come into score) and he plays EVERYDAY. Dusty had a young talent in Jerry Hairston on the bench (recently traded) and we have capable infielders in AAA who could come play second while Walker is filling in at first for DLEE.
Despite the coaching errors and the unfortuante injuries the Cubs still have hope. We recently acquired Tony Womack to play second base, good riddance Neifi, and traded Jerry Hairston for veteran slugger Phil Nevin. Nevin will provide some much needed pop in the line up, and allow Todd Walker to move to his natural second base position. This leaves us with a starting line up of Barrett, Nevin, Walker, Cedeno, Ramirez, Murton, Pierre, and Jones. This is not a bad line up by any means. It is a line up that has severely underachieved this season. If they can get it together and start scoring some runs a solid pitching staff, that is only getting better with the return of Wood and Prior, the Cubs can pull a Houston and sneak into the playoffs.
Then again, I am one of those Cub fans who refuses to believe the phrase Cubs, Useless by September. That is of course until September rolls around.
Not many people remember Fun-Plex, so I'm going to fill you in on what you missed out on as a child. It was a playplace of sorts in a giant wharehouse on Winchester, if memory serves me correct. You walk in, and the first thing you see is a Moon Bounce, that to me seemed as big as a football field, keep in mind I was only four. Then they had this large platform, elevated in the air. In order to reach the top you had to climb tunnels, ladders, and other various things. Once you reached the top you had the choice of multiple slides to return to the ground, like I said, it was a Child's dream place. The fun did not end there. They had bumper boats, scooters, and a giant ball pit connected by bridges and smaller ball pits. I spent most of my time frolicing in the ball pit. (No comments on that)
Well, it was towards the end of our time at Fun-Plex, and my friend and I decided to go on the GIANT Moon Bounce before we left. I was hopping around and having fun, when the attendee decided to let much bigger kids on. I'd say they were probably 11 or 12 years old, remember I was only four. So, I had enough fun on the moon bounce and was making my way towards the exit when I fell down, no big deal right? Wrong! When I fell down a portly African-American girl, around 11 or 12, jumped on my right leg. Little did I know that this portly girl snapped my femur in two. The attendee came in and picked me up and brought me out. They placed me on a bench by the moon bounce and determined my femur was broken. So, my friend and his mom had to rush me to the nearest hospital, St. Francis. I remember getting there and being administered a few shots, and then everything went black. I woke up and they had my leg suspended in the air, and I was in a hospital bed.
The next day they took me into some room and I remember a mask being placed over my mouth and a doctor telling me a story about his dog Toby and how he didn't like to take baths, it was his lame attempt at trying to tell me we may not like what is happening to us at a moment but it is probably for the best. Which is actually good advice, but that's a different rant. Anyways, when I woke up in my room I was in a cast, not just a regular leg cast, but a body cast. They went the full nine yards.
Well, I stayed in the hospital for a few more days where I developed my keen Super Mario Bros. skills. Anyways, they finally took me home where I was forced to lay around, or be wheeled around all day. Don't worry I haven't forgotten the reason I'm writing this.
So, my days consisted of laying around and watching various TV shows. One such show was the classic Family Matters. I could not get enough of Urkel and his love for cheese. I watched that show everyday on WGN. However, one day I could not get to the remote to go to Nickelodeon once Family Matters was over. And guess what came on next. Yes, Chicago Cubs baseball. I fell in love with the Cubs, my dad came home and I started talking about Mark Grace, Shawon Dunston, ERA, batting averages, and all things good with Cubs baseball. Ever since this fateful day I have been a die hard Cubbie fan. Win or lose, I still love them and will always believe next year is the year. Damn you Bartman!
Which brings me to my next point. What is wrong with the 2006 Cubs?
Based on the offseason I thought we'd be in great shape for a playoff run. General Manager, Jim Hendry, made some great offseason acquisitions. We signed the speedy Juan Pierre to fill the role of lead off man, a position that has been an issue for the Cubs for years. Then Hendry addressed the bullpen problem by signing Howry and Eyre, two proven talents who would help the Cubs tremendously throught the season. Finally, Hendry was able to get Jacque Jones in Cubbie blue and be our everyday Left Fielder. Then the Billy Goat started wreaking havoc on the Cubs.
Cub fans soon learned that staff aces Mark Prior and Kerry Wood would not be ready to start the season, and would probably not return to the club until May. Wood is back, but we're in June now and Prior has not yet rejoined the team. If the loss of your two best pitchers wasn't enough, Derrek Lee went down with a broken wrist. For those of you who don't know, Derrek Lee is one of, if not the best first basemen in the MLB. He hits for power, average, drives the ball to the opposite field, and is a remarkable defensive first basemen. Losing DLee not only took away talent, but the heart of the Cubs. It just seems that since that injury the team is hapless. And it doesn't help that Dusty Baker, our coach, is a moron.
Dusty, Dusty, Dusty. Players love him, the fans hate him. The Cubs have a history of brittle arms, Dusty knows this, but he constantly leaves our starters in the game for too long. Carlos Zambrano totals 120 pitches almost every game he pitches in, well above the league average. And you wonder why our pitchers are always going down with injuries? Also, why does he play Neifi Perez. The man is batting below .200, is a terrible fielder (had two errors on one play that allowed the game winnings runs to come into score) and he plays EVERYDAY. Dusty had a young talent in Jerry Hairston on the bench (recently traded) and we have capable infielders in AAA who could come play second while Walker is filling in at first for DLEE.
Despite the coaching errors and the unfortuante injuries the Cubs still have hope. We recently acquired Tony Womack to play second base, good riddance Neifi, and traded Jerry Hairston for veteran slugger Phil Nevin. Nevin will provide some much needed pop in the line up, and allow Todd Walker to move to his natural second base position. This leaves us with a starting line up of Barrett, Nevin, Walker, Cedeno, Ramirez, Murton, Pierre, and Jones. This is not a bad line up by any means. It is a line up that has severely underachieved this season. If they can get it together and start scoring some runs a solid pitching staff, that is only getting better with the return of Wood and Prior, the Cubs can pull a Houston and sneak into the playoffs.
Then again, I am one of those Cub fans who refuses to believe the phrase Cubs, Useless by September. That is of course until September rolls around.
posted by Jason Smith at 9:58 PM
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